What's YOUR game?

Time to steal others content, i just found this on the EU- PVP forums
http://forums.wow-europe.com/thread.html?topicId=2406103920&sid=1&pageNo=1

" After spending far too much time in Alterac Valley, I've noticed that the majority of players conform to one of several different stereotypes in their battleground behaviour. After detailed study I'm pleased to present this thesis on the most common player types found in AV. This is written from a Horde perspective, but I'm sure many of these personas have a similar Alliance counterpart.

Type 1 - "Galvangar's best friend"

This type of player is easy to spot since they'll shout their traditional war cry "X PEOPLE TO GALV PLEASE!" before the gates open, usually in all caps. X varies but is usually at least 10, and can be as high as 30. This is normally ignored by the rest of the team. Galvangar's best friend will then either abandon this tactic (normally with a remark such as "Ok, you guys don't want to win then") or in particularly extreme cases will defend alone and die, giving periodic reports to the team such as "OMG GALV AT 50%" and "GALV DOWN FFS!". Occasionally there are enough of this player type to mount an effective defence at Galvangar, normally causing the Alliance to bypass him completely and take everything else instead.

Type 2 - "The pessimist"

The pessimist is certain that the team will lose the battleground. They often also tell a sad story about how they lost their last 86 games of AV before the gates open, or instead simply state their catchphrase "Let's lose this fast!". Every so often they'll remind the team about this by saying "we've lost now", "no attack - we lose", "no defence - we lose" and similar. Oddly having a very persistent pessimist on the team does seem to greatly increase the chance of a loss, possibly a demoralising effect that requires further study.

Type 3 - "The intellectually inferior pessimist"

Exactly the same as the pessimist except that they spell "lose" as "loose" every time.

Type 4 - "The optimist"

In many ways the opposite to the pessimist, the optimist never admits defeat. They can frequently be found shouting "ALL IN TO VAN NOW!" with 4 marshals still alive in the opposing boss room and no graveyards to spawn at, or "DON'T DIE!" when losing by 500 reinforcements to 3.

Type 5 - "The armchair general"

This type of player knows the perfect tactic to win AV, and will try to command the other 39 players, none of whom he knows, to follow it. Lines such as "group 2 defend SH bunker!", "stealthers to Dun Baldar!" and "do not cap SH graveyard!" are common. The armchair general typically has a bad temper and will often let insults fly if their tactic isn't followed, or if another armchair general with a different tactic is in the same battleground.

Type 6 - "The limited scope armchair general"

This player is similar to the armchair general, but only knows or understands one section of a tactic, not capping Stonehearth graveyard. They can typically be found yelling "DO NOT CAP SH GRAVEYARD" around 500 times every match, and often stand near SH graveyard shouting it and whispering people who might accidently walk within 100 metres of it to ensure that they don't capture it. They will happily remain there for the rest of the game until killed, unless SH graveyard is captured - they then turn into the pessimist.

Type 7 - "The clown" AKA "The baiter"

The baiter attempts to deliberately aggravate one or more other players who is predictable in their behaviour. For example, they will say "LOL GALV SUX, ALL ATTACK!" to Galvangar's best friend, or "I got it, cap SH!" to the limited scope armchair general. The baiter is usually trying to win peer approval and is afraid of being called down, so won't actually cap SH or ignore tactics, they just claim they will.

Type 8 - "The rebel"

The rebel is superficially similar to the baiter, but they will follow through on their threats and are driven by anarchic motives. They never follow tactics and will capture SH graveyard at any opportunity. The rebel cares little about winning and will often AFK out later in the match after annoying sufficient people.

Type 9 - "The AFK King"

The AFK King, unlike a standard AFKer or botter, plays for around the first 2 minutes of every game. He'll use this time to run to the nearest bunker, and possibly kill an archer or cap the flag if feeling particularly zealous. He then spends the rest of the match playing Guitar Hero and can frequently be seen standing around on full health inside a bunker that the other side have just recapped.

Type 10 - "The victim"

A variant of the AFK King, the victim goes AFK in more obvious places such as the starting cave. After inevitably being reported, they'll return and make accusatory remarks such as "Who the hell reported me? I wasn't AFK, I was just going to the toilet/fetching a drink/cleaning up vomit/driving my sick Gran to hospital/giving birth". They generally don't understand the meaning of AFK.

Type 11 - "The inept clicker"

The inept clicker has never actually got into AV, but is included here because they spend more of their time standing close to the AV battlemaster. Their catch phrases include "please move off the battlemaster", "FFS MOVE!!!" and "Where is the battlemaster?" They'll usually give up and log off after around 3 hours, and don't know about name plates.

Type 12 - "The accusatory inept ninja"

The inept ninja speeds ahead of the rest of the team at the beginning of each game, typically using auras, riding crop, stealth etc. to reach the enemy base first. Once they arrive they'll capture a bunker or graveyard then immediately start yelling "HELP DUN BALDAR NORTH!!!" or similar as the enemy team's 12 defenders immediately kill him and take it back with the rest of the team 5 minutes away. They then like to ask "OMG WHY NO HELP???" or accuse the rest of the team of being terrible.

Type 13 - "The pro ninja"

A very rare type of player, the pro ninja never speaks, either because they are focusing 100%, or because they're some form of cyborg that communicates only in binary. They rush an objective single handedly much like the inept ninja, but then use their uber skills to kill any defenders inside or any force that tries to take it back. They can frequently be seen killing 5 enemy players single handedly with their superhuman reflexes.

Type 14 - "The sheep"

The most common type of player, the sheep seeks out the position on the map with the most friendly players. The sheep is slightly magnetic, so if left to their own devices they will move slowly north, attacking Balinda at the start of the game, and then proceed slowly to Dun Baldar, capping bunkers on the way. They will never defend an objective, and will move on with the rest of the zerg as it is capped. If there is significant defence, the sheep is usually the first to die, and will instead usually stand around the Horde base with any other sheep who met with the same fate, whether or not it is being attacked."


It made me smile ;)
im so a pro ninja :P